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Loosing Virginity

Posted In Desi By RateDesi - 12 Jan 2019

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Losing Virginity to a Hookup

Virginity in a desi context has always been a big thing and a woman’s sexuality has always been a taboo. I have always seen virginity as a social construct. For me, embracing my sexuality was rough but it had nothing to do with virginity.

Losing your virginity can still be daunting, it was for me too and it is okay if you want your first time to be special.

Sex means different things to different people, for some it is just about pleasure and to explore sexuality, for others it is more about emotions and finding that emotional connection.

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If you can separate emotions from sex, then hookups might just be what would work for you. It gets complicated when you cannot maintain a line between emotions and sex, it costs a lot. Trust me, been there done that.

I lost my virginity to a hookup and honestly it wasn’t a very good experience but it did help me get over a lot of traumas and explore my sexuality.

It made me realize that sex is a difference experience with different people and it has absolutely nothing to do with being ‘’experienced.’’

Don’t use sex to get over traumas. Honestly, don’t; it never ends good.

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Having sex when you are a virgin is awkward and it becomes even more awkward when you lose your virginity to a hookup. You are just so clueless and you don’t even know the other person and it just makes everything so hard.

Having done that, I honestly won’t recommend it but if you think you are confident enough to get over the awkwardness and not get your emotions involved then it might actually be a good idea, considering if things go wrong you can always call it quits; and it is so much easier to do it with somebody you barely know

Hookups require so much less of emotional labor and if you are somebody who can keep sex and emotions separate then it might actually work for you.

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Losing your virginity is daunting because you are just so clueless and you are just so nervous. To feel all jittery is totally normal, but just make sure you are not pushing yourself into it. It will end up being a disaster if you are not ready. No matter your reason, make sure you make a conscious choice and don’t regret it in the future

My first time might not be with the right person but I still don’t regret it because it taught me so much about myself and it gave me that liberty to explore my sexuality and own it and be proud of it. A women’s sexuality is nothing to be ashamed of, no matter what the society tells you.

Sex is a beautiful experience and physical pleasure shouldn’t be seen as a taboo.

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I don’t know why society has to make it so hard. Sex can be truly amazing, it is always better to stay safe and go for it if you find somebody you think you are compatible with.

There is also nothing wrong with wanting an emotional connection, there is nothing wrong with you if you cannot separate sex from emotions, honestly it is perfectly normal.

Different things mean to different people and different things work for different people.

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You just need to figure out what works for you. Always understand your needs and always listen to your guts. Your guts never lie to you, if your gut says you are not ready then you probably should listen to it.

No matter if you are in a relationship, or married, or just wanna hook up with a random dude, if you aren’t ready you just aren’t and there is nothing wrong with it.

If you aren’t comfortable you aren’t. Give yourself time, don’t push it. Things will settle down on their own.

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Wait, if you have to, even if you wanna hook up. Be careful about who you choose and be safe. Things are not as hard as they seem to be but never go for it if you are not sure you won’t regret it.

Losing your virginity and regretting it is probably the worst thing you can do to yourself. I prefer hookups because they are less emotional work and less of distractions.

No-strings-attached is something that works for me. It doesn’t work for everybody but for whom it does, it works amazing. The only thing I wish somebody would have told me was that your first time would be awkward no matter what.

It is always awkward. You have no idea what to do, you have no idea what to say. You have absolutely no idea how would things work and trust me, sex in real life is so not like what’s it like in the porn.

Just remember to keep all your expectations at the door.

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The more you expect, the disappointed you’ll be. I’m not saying it is gonna be terrible, but just don’t expect much and focus on enjoying yourself and exploring.

Honestly sex is all about exploring and what you like and what doesn’t work for you. The more you explore, the more you will be able to enjoy it.

Always take your time and don’t let anybody rush you into it. If at any point you feel uncomfortable just leave. You are not bound to stay, you are never bound to stay.

Never hesitate to stay no. Never be afraid to walk out on somebody who makes you uncomfortable.

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It is always your choice. You should never feel like your ‘no’ doesn’t matter, it does and it always will, never let anybody tell you otherwise. It is okay to want sex, it is okay to not want sex, and it is okay to change your mind. Sex is fun but always remember that it is your body, and it is your choice, only yours.